"Welcome to the fancy new [Videogum]. When we first started planning our redesign, we knew we wanted the best, so we hired the Chief Web Programmer from Jukt Micronics and we said “we have two words for you: Geocities 3.5.” He stroked his waxed goatee for a minute and fiddled with his Dr. Who decoder ring, and then he he was like “OK, but I’m gonna need a case of Mountain Dew Code Black, a floor-length trenchcoat, and to live in my parents’ basement,” and we were like, “Done."
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